Hey: It's A Happy Post!

Wow, it's been a while since I've been on this bad boy. I figure I need to start writing in these things more. Just some random thoughts that I've been rolling around: 

Still haven't found a job. I'm going to make a phone call to a place I got interviewed at today and hope for the best. I really need to get a job soon, because as stated to many, things are getting rather tight. Money isn't something that comes easy to someone who doesn't work. Some may say, 'Well, you get money from your mom'. to which I say 'Yes, but 150 bucks a week doesn't pay all the bills, my friend.' Either way, a job needs to happen soon. 

The Scars Of Mirrodin Pre-Release is coming soon. I'm hoping for it to end well, but I know that it's going to be difficult with all of these different mechanics hitting the board at once. Infect, Metalcraft, Proliferate,etc.. are definitely going to add to the metagame in a huge way and let's hope that we can get some early previews of them so I can work on them a little bit before the midnight release September 24th. 

On to the world of music. Bonded By Blood, obviously named after the legendary Exodus album, is the only re-thrash band I'm really liking, to be honest. Bands like Toxic Holocaust and Municipal Waste are good in what they do in their own right, but I'm just not into them. I think that they are just boring. What's really awesome about Bonded By Blood is they sound extremely close to Exodus and their high pitched thrash metal vocals. Definitely check out their CD Exiled To Earth when you can or check our their Myspace to check out some songs. Also check out my reviews blog here soon for a review of the album. Ozzy's new album sucks, obviously. Sharon is still pulling the strings here, no doubt about it. Gus G. definitely adds some flavor to it, but it's still dull as fuckin' dishwater. Iron Maiden's new one is ordinary Maiden, but it's getting to the point where Maiden are just able to put out a record and if it's anything like any of their other albums, automatically gets a great rating. I might do a review of that one as well. Found a new style of music that I'm kind of interested in. It's called Shoegaze Black Metal. Go to Youtube and search for Sleeping Peonies or Alcest and take a listen to those bands and that's the basic idea. I just got around to catching two music DVD's that I've been wanting to check out: Slayer's Still Reigning and As I Lay Dying's This Is Who We Are. Still Reigning was a performance of the classic Reign In Blood. Not bad at all. Straightforward old-school Slayer. This Is Who We Are is basically a retrospective of As I Lay Dying's career up to An Ocean Between Us. The first two shows shown, one performing Frail Words Collapse at a small church and the other performing Shadows Are Security at the Turtle Club were both interesting, but after that, the DVD got real stale. Arena performances and just basically archival footage. The DVD tries too hard to be both a retrospective and a live DVD, and fails at both. Not recommended unless you are a huge AILD fan.  There are a few other bands I would like to reccomend to anyone who wants to try something new out. Woe,Is Me is a post-hardcore band, Within The Ruins just put out Invade, and man, it has some sick weedily. 

There are several movies out that I really want to see: Inception, Machete, Pirhana 3D, The Last Exorcism just to name a few. It's been forever since I've seen a movie in theaters (The last being Avatar in 3D). I think the next time I have some spare money, I'm going to see a 5.00 showing on a weeknight at the Barry Woods. 

Well, that's about it. Have a good one, folks! 

Currently Listening To: Bonded By Blood- Genetic Encryption

A Frightening Nightmare

Ugh, I'm tearing my hair out this morning after a shocking nightmare that popped up on me. I need to write about it. 

Basically, me and a group of friends lived in a house. I had seen a similar house in dreams before, so it was definitely familiar. I remember going to the bathroom and noticing a new group of neighbors was moving into the house next door. Then a flashback triggered where the person, a personal friend of mine, had lived there. I then flashback further to see my personal friend's head exploding into a shower of bloody chunks and gore from a sniper's bullet. The sniper is an evil entity that I can't quite identify, but I do know that it manifests itself as an older, crafty gentleman, similar to Sir Anthony Hopkin's character in The Silence Of the Lambs films.  

Back to reality. After telling the two friends I live with that we have new neighbors, we all have that sickening feeling of remembrance about the sniper that took our friend's life. I'm the only one that knows that this entity has been following me for years, destroying my friends one by one, but for some reason, leaving me alive. I then flashback to the large, dilapidated apartment building, scraping the skies in it's height, where I know the entity is located, but for some reason, cannot reach the entity itself and destroy it. 

After this whole sequence, we head to an unknown pizza place. We have apparently placed an order ahead of time and pick it up. We then notice that the waiter looks very similar to a mutual friend of ours that was destroyed in this fashion. We speak to him to only find out that it is said friend. Our joy in finding him alive (Somehow after taking a bullet to the skull. He explains it as taking 3 in the chest) is cut short by a phone call that I receive. It's a heavy, labored breathing, then the line goes dead. I immediately know who it is. I tell my friends and we decide we need to move. Now. We ask our friend if he will go with us, but he has apparently accepted fate and decides to stay behind. We are all saddened, but know if we don't move, we're going to die. 

We all jump in a vehicle and head towards the building of the entity's presence I don't know why we went there, but we did. We try to pick up a friend there, watching the windows for sniper fire or anyone suspicious. The friend exits the building, flanked by several people, seemingly a human shield, and the fire rings out. Gunshots rip into the chests of the human shield our friend is encased in. he makes a run for our vehicle but is taken down in a shower of blood and gore. We take cover behind the vehicle and then I wake up. 

I don't know why I continue to have this nightmare, but it haunts me. I'm deeply disturbed with this dream and know it will return eventually. Let's just hope not soon. 


-Taylor 

...And So It Begins

Hello. This is my personal blog for any thoughts, ravings, rantings, musings, etc... that I have in my brain at the time. I'm not going to bother introducing myself, just because I believe that anyone that reads this will already know me. I'm not going to bore you with details about my mundane existence on this earth because a lot of people already do this to you, and I find it unfair to subject you to such useless information, as most of you already know me in person or will never know me in person.

Let's get on with the agenda here...

Things have not been going the best lately. I've once again slacked off in my courses and ended up on the tail end of something I really don't want to be a part of. A cycle that I, for some reason, cannot seem to break. A cycle of catch up and stupidity for slacking off. Why does it seem like I can't shake this, no matter how hard I try? It seems like I'm reverting to high school mentality for this. I don't want to, though. That's the thing: I seem to revert to this high school mentality and it's something that I do not desire in any way. Sure, high school was easy and things were a little less stressful, but now it's come to the point where I either need to grow up or shut up. I'm still not active in politics like you would figure a person my age would be. It's because I don't understand things like politics and for some reason, don't have a desire to, even though I know that these things will effect my life forever. Can someone please explain this feeling of helplessness that I get whenever someone that is smarter than I am and is well versed in these issues begins to try to explain? I don't get it anymore.

That's not the only problem I'm having. I seem to be letting down my family in ways that I thought I would never venture to do. All the while, I try to keep up this shiny veneer that shows that I'm doing just fine and these failures aren't bothering me in any way, but in reality, they bug the living shit out of me. I can't seem to get my head on straight and make the decisions that I know I need to make in life to be successful. Sometimes, I'm afraid that I will amount to nothing. Just a useless waste of human flesh that I hate so much. But if I'm scared of this fate, why do I continue to pursue it with useless and mundane things? I just want to leave my head and get away from all of these problems, and hopefully, this blog will release some of the deep seated feelings I have towards myself.

Do you ever get the feeling like you aren't a good enough person to be with someone? I get that feeling every time I'm with her. I just feel like she's holding me up by my neck and I refuse to put any effort into anything! It hurts so bad to know that she's struggling through things while I sit here lazily and do nothing. But I still feel this weird sense of entitlement to relax and take things lightly. I don't want that anymore. I want to get serious about my life, but it feels like something is holding me from doing this. Is it the ever present feeling in everyone that they don't want to grow up and remain young and naive about everything?

As you can see, I'm having trouble expressing and dealing with my own life. Something needs to happen soon with my mentality, or I'm going to be stuck in this area forever. It's a horrible feeling.

As most of the people reading this know that I am not currently employed. I'm seeking employment, but I just can't seem to find anything. Blame whatever you will on this, whether it be my extreme appearance, my lack of work ethic or just the economy, but either way you slice it, It's not good. I need to find a job soon or things aren't going to go anywhere. I'm really upset right now and things like nicotine, caffeine and my myriad of other vices are not helping at all. It's upsetting knowing that I have a sickness and the medicines I turn to aren't helping anymore...




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Now playing: Behemoth - No Sympathy For Fools
via FoxyTunes